Dear Sir

I am much obliged for your letter & very kind present of the vol. of the Index for 1870.² I sincerely honour your zeal & exertions in the noble cause of truth, & I wish I could assist you. But in truth I do not know what I could write, which would be fit to read before your Lecture (about which I am much pleased to hear).³ My views are far from clear, as you will readily perceive if you will will read the last page in my Variation of Animals & Plants under Domestication.⁴ I can never make up my mind how far an inward conviction that there must be some Creator or First Cause is really trustworthy evidence. Moreover I have been for the last six weeks much out of health with giddiness & other head-symptoms, & do not feel equal to deep reflexion on the deepest subject which can fill a man’s mind. In fact I have only during the last few days been able to do anything of any sort.—

With respect to my former notes to you, I quite forget their contents.⁵ I have to write many letters, & can reflect but little on what I write; but, I fully believe & hope that I have never written a word, which at the time I did not think; but I think that you will agree with me that anything which is to be given to the public ought to be maturely weighed & cautiously put. It never occurred to me that you would wish to print any extract from my notes: if it had, I would have kept a copy. I put “private” from habit, only as yet partially acquired, from some hasty notes of mine having been printed, which were not in the least degree worth printing, though otherwise unobjectionable.⁶

It is simply ridiculous to suppose that my former note to you would be worth sending to me, with any part marked, which you desire to print; but if you like to do so I will at once say whether I sh^d. have any objection.⁷ I feel in some degree unwilling to express myself publicly on religious subjects, as I do not feel that I have thought deeply enough to justify any publicity.— Pray forgive this ill-expressed note, but I am tired & cannot rewrite it—

With sincere respect & good wishes, I remain | My dear Sir | Yours very faithfully | Ch Darwin

I have shown your Boston Lecture to several persons, & all have been much impressed by it.—⁸