From John Scott 14 April 1
I really cannot thank you as I would wish to do for your kind letter of the 9 ult.2 It is most gratifying to me, to know that my little contributions have induced you to write me, in such a kindly manner.3 It is especially consolatory in my present circumstances; feeling as I do so chagrined with the cold, discouraging requitment of my services at the Bot. Gard.4 Indeed, it so perplexes me with respect to my future plans, that I am utterly unable to concentrate my mind as I would like to do in the working out of my experiments: though entirely disengaged from other duties, I have as yet merely completed the drawing up of my tables.5 I daresay you will can fancy—from the way in which I was engaged with experiments &c. formerly—that time hangs somewhat wearily in my hands. While in the Bot. Gard. I had a prospective pleasure of gradually acquiring positions which would enable me more and more to follow out and acquire a knowledge of science, and thus raise myself above the mere mechanical drudgery of gardening. The relinquishment of these hopes & the idea that I may yet have to betake myself to the latter greviously disquiets me: inducing indeed, an inward dread of life’s future.
I would have liked for reasons you assigne to have remained longer in the Bot. Gard. but from what I have previously mentioned & likewise from an incumbent necessity of being a burden on my few remaining relatives so long as I remained there, I was somewhat reluctantly compelled to leave. Having done so I am now at a loss what step to take next. My relatives naturally think—from what they have seen of other young men—that If I had exerted myself properly while in the Bot. Gard. I might have got a situation as Gard. to some of our nobility.6 For sometime back, however, I have wished to avoid entering into engagements as such; as I would rather be in a position where I would have greater facilities for following out my old pursuits
If my abilities had been at all sufficient, I should have liked to have supported myself for the present by contributing to some of our scientific journals; and I could thus have had more time to have seen whether or not anything likely to suit my tastes would turn up.
Such a plan as that which you have so kindly suggested—had your health been better—would above all others been that which I would have had most pleasure in following out;7 if my abilities had been at all sufficient for the work you had in view.
I can see perfectly the difficulties in the way to Dr Hooker’s recommending me.8 Two or three years ago Mr. Page (author of the Geological Text Books &c.)9 offered to do what he could to get me into Kew, but I did not care about leaving Edinburgh at the time. I do not now regret it however as it has afforded me the opportunity of following out experiments which I might never have had at Kew. In the event of any opening occuring now at Kew, do you think Dr. Hooker would give me an opportunity to work under him? Thanks for copy of Reader.10
Yours most respectfully & obliged | J. Scott
Thanks for CD’s consoling letter. His mind cannot concentrate after losing his position, and he feels "an inward dread of life’s future". Would have been glad to work for CD. Understands why Hooker cannot recommend him.
Please cite as
Darwin Correspondence Project, “Letter no. 4463,” accessed on 2 May 2016, http://www.darwinproject.ac.uk/DCP-LETT-4463